Chapter 10 - THE DRY BLANKET.
Sophie’s blanket became Emily's anchor.
Whenever the room got too loud, she touched it.
Grey knit.
Soft.
Dry.
The repaired seam near one corner rubbed against her thumb.
Her mother had originally bought it years before Sophie existed.
Not for a baby.
For "someday."
Her mother died before someday arrived.
Frank had found the blanket in a closet when Emily was pregnant.
He washed it twice.
Then called Emily and said, "Found something your mom had no business buying fifteen years early."
Emily cried when he brought it over.
Ryan thought the story was sweet.
He also said the blanket looked old.
Emily had noticed.
Of course she had.
He hadn't said ugly.
He hadn't said cheap.
Just old.
Small words.
Always small.
Now that old blanket had stayed around Sophie while muddy water swallowed the parking lot.
Emily touched the seam again.
Frank noticed.
"Your mom would be yelling at all of us."
Emily smiled faintly.
"Mostly you."
"Absolutely me."
"She would've chained you to a chair."
"Only if she could find one nobody reserved."
Emily looked at him.
Frank's expression went innocent.
She laughed.
A real laugh.
It surprised her.
Ryan heard from across the room.
He looked over.
For a second, Emily saw loneliness on his face.
Then one of the paramedics asked him another question.
Ryan turned away.
Frank sat beside Emily.
"You okay?"
"No."
"Good answer."
She looked at him.
"Do you think I should leave him?"
Frank did not answer.
"Dad."
"No."
"No you don't?"
"No, I'm not answering."
"Why?"
"Because then whatever you decide becomes about whether you listened to me."
Emily sighed.
"You make everything difficult."
"Genetics."
She smiled despite herself.
Then became serious.
"What would Mom say?"
Frank's eyes softened.
"She'd say Ryan scared the hell out of her."
"That's not advice."
"Your mother gave terrible advice."
Emily laughed again.
Frank looked toward Ryan.
"She'd also wait until he explained himself."
"He has."
"No."
Emily frowned.
"He admitted he panicked."
"That's part."
"What else?"
Frank looked at her.
"Ask him why he's working so hard to make the story smaller."
Emily's smile disappeared.
"Nearby."
Frank nodded.
"You heard."
"I heard."
"He didn't lie."
"No."
"Technically."
Frank shrugged.
"Technical truth's useful when you're trying to avoid the big truth."
Emily looked down at Sophie.
"What is the big truth?"
Frank's jaw tightened.
"I don't know."
"Yes, you do."
"I know what I think."
"Same thing."
"No."
Again.
Facts and conclusions.
Emily was beginning to understand why Frank refused to give her the simple accusation she kept inviting.
He wanted her to see it herself.
That made her angry.
It also made her safer.
Ryan came over.
"Can I sit?"
Emily nodded.
Frank stood.
"I'll go help."
Ryan said, "You can stay."
Frank looked surprised.
So did Emily.
Ryan sat.
Frank remained standing.
Ryan rubbed his hands together.
"I want to say something."
Frank waited.
Ryan looked at Emily first.
"I panicked."
She nodded.
"I told you that."
"Yes."
"I got out and for a few seconds I wasn't thinking clearly."
Frank's face remained unreadable.
Ryan continued.
"I should've turned around."
Emily's chest tightened.
"I should've looked for you."
She nodded.
"I should've asked about Sophie."
Frank inhaled slowly.
Ryan looked at him.
"There. Is that what you wanted?"
The apology cracked.
Emily felt it.
Frank did too.
He answered quietly.
"No."
Ryan laughed bitterly.
"Of course not."
Frank sat again.
"What I want doesn't matter."
"Then why are you staring at me like I'm a criminal?"
"I ain't."
"You are."
Frank leaned forward.
"Ryan, you made a mistake in a flood. Big mistake. Scary mistake. I can understand panic."
Ryan stared.
Frank continued.
"What I don't understand is why every time somebody asks what happened, you change one little piece."
Ryan's face hardened.
"I don't."
"You told the paramedic Emily was nearby."
"She was."
"You told Daniel she never went as far as you."
"She didn't."
"You told Emily you knew she had the baby."
"I did."
"Then you told her you thought she had the baby."
Ryan's mouth tightened.
Emily watched.
Frank wasn't shouting.
He wasn't insulting him.
He was stacking Ryan's own sentences.
Ryan looked toward Emily.
"You told him?"
Emily felt a flash of anger.
"You said it in front of him."
Ryan looked back at Frank.
"You're keeping score."
Frank nodded.
"Yes."
That surprised everybody.
Ryan blinked.
Frank said, "Because my daughter was in that parking lot holding a newborn."
Silence.
Frank pointed toward the muddy car seat.
"And that thing was floating in brown water."
Ryan followed his hand.
Frank's voice remained controlled.
"If everybody in this building is going to act like this was just a bad insurance day, then yeah. I'm keeping score."
Emily felt tears come.
She hated crying in front of people.
She wiped them away quickly.
Ryan looked at her.
His anger faded.
"Em."
She shook her head.
Ryan lowered his voice.
"I'm sorry."
She nodded.
Frank stood.
"I'm getting coffee."
Ryan said, "Frank."
He stopped.
Ryan struggled with the words.
"I am sorry."
Frank looked at him.
"I heard you."
No forgiveness.
No accusation.
Just acknowledgement.
He walked away.
Ryan sat beside Emily.
For a moment, neither spoke.
Then Ryan reached toward Sophie.
Emily let him touch the blanket.
He traced the repaired seam.
"I remember this."
Emily nodded.
"Mom bought it."
"I know."
"You called it old."
Ryan closed his eyes.
"God."
"It was."
"I was an ass."
"You were sometimes."
He looked at her.
"Sometimes?"
She almost smiled.
He did too.
The tiny moment of humor hurt.
Because there was still a version of them in the room.
A married couple.
A tired new mother.
A frightened husband.
A newborn.
A blanket.
Normal people in a terrible day.
Emily wanted that version.
She wanted to go home.
She wanted Sophie in her crib.
She wanted Ryan to make tea.
She wanted Frank to complain about the thermostat.
She wanted this to become a story they told badly in five years.
Remember the flood?
Remember Dad hauling that disgusting car seat inside?
Remember how scared we were?
She wanted it so badly that she almost decided to forgive everything before she understood it.
Then Linda Carter entered.
She was holding Ryan's phone.
"I think this is yours."
Ryan stood.
"Where'd you find it?"
"Front entrance."
He took it.
"Thanks."
Linda looked at Emily.
Then at Ryan.
"I need to correct something I said earlier."
Ryan went still.
Emily's stomach dropped.
"What?"
Linda folded her hands.
"I told Emily I didn't hear you ask where the baby was."
Ryan looked at Emily.
Then back.
Linda continued.
"I've been thinking about it."
Ryan's face changed.
Hope.
Actual hope.
Emily saw it.
Linda saw it too.
And that was why her next sentence cut so deeply.
"I wasn't close enough to say you never asked anybody."
Ryan exhaled.
Then Linda added:
"But I was close enough to hear the first thing you did ask."
The room went quiet around them.
Ryan's hand tightened around his phone.
Emily whispered:
"What was it?"
May you like
Linda looked straight at Ryan.
"You asked if anyone had seen your keys."
